No more FOMO: Eliminating the fear of missing out
Wikipedia describes FOMO, or “fear of missing out,” as a form of social anxiety where one is compulsively concerned they might miss an opportunity for social interaction, a novel experience, profitable investment or another satisfying event.
I’m sure you’ve experienced FOMO at various times in your life. It turns out graduate school is a fantastic lab to study FOMO. Given the intensity of competition between various priorities, FOMO could be a huge problem if you let it. Author and psychology professor Dan Ariely claims that FOMO is fear of regret, that we have made the wrong decision on how to spend our time as “you can imagine how things could be different.”
FOMO is the sort of problem that can plague us.
As business leaders, entrepreneurs and investors, it will always be tempting to follow the latest fad. As parents, it will be tempting to push our kids toward the latest and greatest achievement. As people, we’ll be sorely tempted to try various external quick fixes in our own pursuit of happiness.
So, how do we avoid FOMO? Based on my limited experience, here are three thoughts that might help:
1. UNDERSTAND YOUR CORE PRIORITIES.
First, no matter what we do, understand why we’re doing what we’re doing and what our priorities are.
2. DO YOUR OWN HOMEWORK AND GO IN WITH A HYPOTHESIS.
The biggest cause for FOMO is when we don’t do our own homework. This lack of work can lead us to believe everyone else around us knows exactly what they’re doing. The solution to this is to always go into what we’re doing with a hypothesis. Top venture capital firms are increasingly adopting the idea of a thesis-driven approach to investing. And, the best hypotheses/theses are aligned firmly with core priorities.
3. BE WILLING TO HAVE DISCUSSIONS AROUND YOUR HYPOTHESIS AND CHANGE YOUR MIND.
No hypothesis/thesis is final, of course. It is completely OK to decide to change your mind after discussions. People around us often have incredible insights about us that will help us on our journey. But, at the risk of repeating myself, it matters that we always have a clear thesis that we’re testing. We’re the drivers here.
The underlying principle here is to shift focus from what everyone else around us is doing to what we’re doing. No one really knows what makes sense for us. That’s not to say we know better, but we probably have the best shot at it. So, let’s use the privileged position to figure out what would actually work.
In that sense, avoiding FOMO becomes really easy when we realize that it isn’t about “them.” This is all about us. It’s our life and it is up to us to make it meaningful, to make it count.
I’m sure you’ve experienced FOMO at various times in your life. It turns out graduate school is a fantastic lab to study FOMO. Given the intensity of competition between various priorities, FOMO could be a huge problem if you let it. Author and psychology professor Dan Ariely claims that FOMO is fear of regret, that we have made the wrong decision on how to spend our time as “you can imagine how things could be different.”
FOMO is the sort of problem that can plague us.
As business leaders, entrepreneurs and investors, it will always be tempting to follow the latest fad. As parents, it will be tempting to push our kids toward the latest and greatest achievement. As people, we’ll be sorely tempted to try various external quick fixes in our own pursuit of happiness.
So, how do we avoid FOMO? Based on my limited experience, here are three thoughts that might help:
1. UNDERSTAND YOUR CORE PRIORITIES.
First, no matter what we do, understand why we’re doing what we’re doing and what our priorities are.
2. DO YOUR OWN HOMEWORK AND GO IN WITH A HYPOTHESIS.
The biggest cause for FOMO is when we don’t do our own homework. This lack of work can lead us to believe everyone else around us knows exactly what they’re doing. The solution to this is to always go into what we’re doing with a hypothesis. Top venture capital firms are increasingly adopting the idea of a thesis-driven approach to investing. And, the best hypotheses/theses are aligned firmly with core priorities.
3. BE WILLING TO HAVE DISCUSSIONS AROUND YOUR HYPOTHESIS AND CHANGE YOUR MIND.
No hypothesis/thesis is final, of course. It is completely OK to decide to change your mind after discussions. People around us often have incredible insights about us that will help us on our journey. But, at the risk of repeating myself, it matters that we always have a clear thesis that we’re testing. We’re the drivers here.
The underlying principle here is to shift focus from what everyone else around us is doing to what we’re doing. No one really knows what makes sense for us. That’s not to say we know better, but we probably have the best shot at it. So, let’s use the privileged position to figure out what would actually work.
In that sense, avoiding FOMO becomes really easy when we realize that it isn’t about “them.” This is all about us. It’s our life and it is up to us to make it meaningful, to make it count.
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